Happy birthday, KerrBear!
You should be 41 today. 41... it sounds old. I've been teasing Jordan because he's 31 and that sounds old. The number after hitting that "big" year actually sounds sooo much older to me. It's been fun to tease Jordan that he's now soooo old. It makes me sad that I can't tease you, too. So many people try to avoid growing old by covering up wrinkles or what not but I think growing old is such a prrivledge. It means you've lived and loved another day. It means you had another day of creating memories and moments with friends and family. You should be growing old with us.
It's 2017. I felt sad as the clock struck midnight. Another new year. Another year without new memories with you.
Big things in 2017:
- Zion's bar mitzvah is this month! I have this feeling that he's going to just blow us away and be the most amazing shining star on the bimah. Jordan and I have planned a great party - you'd love it. Very relaxed and tons of fun. Zion looks so much like steve as he's getting older, but still has Micki's eyes. He's really becoming a young man.
- Simons bar mitzvah is this year! It will be hard. A boy should have his parents at his bar mitzvah. Period. He will have a LOT of love, though. I hope for him they'll be a moment ... a moment when he's on the bimah that he can feel your presence and Allan's presence. I haven't been one with deep faith lately, but I do hope and pray that Simon gets a sense of your pride and joy that day. I know you'd be so proud of your baby boy.
- issac turns 16! What a big year! The funny thing is, it's not hard to believe. Issac looks like such a man!!! I looked at a pic of him from NYE and thought, woah! He's such a man!! He is so tall and not skinny issac anymore ... he is big and muscular now like andrew. He'll be going into his junior year this fall. I'm now a pro on ACTs and college visits so we're good! :)
- andrew goes to college this year. Drumroll..... he's going to be a cardinal at the university of Louisville! I'm so so so proud of him! He has really done so well at GBN and did so well on his ACTs. He's focused himself academically, socially, and professionally and is excelling in all categories. He got into all 4 colleges he applied to and took his decision seriously. Dropping him off at school is going to be so hard!!!!!! I'm so glad he's just an easy drive away. You raised such a good boy.
We're going to the cemetery today to visit the plaque. The boys joked we should bring balloons like when you went for Allan's birthday. I like that they have the same sense of humor we did. Simon asked if we could go today. Today will be the third day this week I get to see Simon and I'm so excited. Any day I see the boys, I feel better. They've always had my heart, but since you passed, they hold my heart together. On days when I see Simon and we get along well, it's like I have a skip in my step. I'm not always his favorite person so when we get along, it means so much to me.
I miss you, Kerr. I miss you every day. I miss you all day.
Happy birthday. I want to believe you can see this blog. I want to believe you're well. I want to believe you're celebrating with the fam up there.
xo
Me
